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Male Menopause and Irritable Male Syndrome

Dr. Fred: Jed, your book, Irritable Male Syndrome opened my eyes to what I face as a man. I can identify with the “irritable male” and have recommended the book to several of my clients and associates. Why did you choose men as a focus for your writing and clinical practice?

When I started working in the field 44 years ago, the focus was mostly on women. I felt the field of men’s health needed a champion.

Dr. Fred: Especially with regard to the Third Age (45 to 75 years old), could you summarize what are the main problems that men face?

There are issues that men and women have to deal with as we age: aches and pains, illness, dying parents, young adult children, and so on. But there are also issues that are unique to men such as Male Menopause (Andropause), Male Irritability Syndrome, and Male Type Depression that I discuss in my books.

Dr. Fred: Much of what we offer our readers has to do with debunking the myth of the midlife crisis and the relationship to midlife as transition. What is your opinion on this subject?

I see midlife, in many ways, as akin to adolescence. At both times in life, we are going through a major transition. In the case of adolescence, we pass from childhood to early adulthood. In the case of midlife, we make the transition from early adulthood to what I call super-adulthood. For the first time, we have a chance to truly be who we were meant to be.

Dr. Fred: In the products and services you offer, you write about depression, menopause, and irritable man syndrome. How are they related?

I see these issues as three separate but overlapping circles. Male menopause affects all men, sometimes between the ages of 40 and 55, although it can start as early as 35 or as late as 65. Irritable Man Syndrome affects a smaller but still significant number of men (perhaps 60-80%). Male type depression affects a smaller number of men. We assumed that women suffer from depression at twice the rates of men. But my research shows that many depressed men are underdiagnosed and undertreated because we use the wrong diagnostic criteria.

Dr. Fred: How would you distinguish or differentiate (key aspects) Irritable Man Syndrome from similar syndromes?

Irritable Man Syndrome has four main causes: hormonal fluctuations, changes in brain chemistry, increased stress, and changes in male identity. It takes a trained practitioner to distinguish IMS from things like depression, bipolar disorder, PTSD, ADHD, and other disorders.

Dr. Fred: You say “IMS is ultimately about violence”. Could you tell us more?

We live in a violent world. We see it expressed in childhood where children are abused (including circumcision, which I believe is a form of child sexual abuse). As we age, this destructive upbringing expresses itself in irritability, hypersensitivity, anger and rage. When turned inward, it can lead to suicide. When turned outward, it can lead to violence and war.

Dr. Fred: What makes men susceptible to SMI?

Some are our inherent hormonal complement. Having testosterone makes us vulnerable to aggression. Many are familiar with the rage that results from taking anabolic steroids (called “roid rage”). We would see that in footballers or weightlifters. Although this is a problem, it has really been hyped up. It turns out the real problem isn’t too much testosterone, but too little. When men lose their testosterone, they become more restless, irritable, and angry. Changing exercise habits and dietary changes can be helpful. The same goes for testosterone supplementation for some men.

Dr. Fred: Why is it important for women to be aware of this syndrome and male menopause?

IMS can be a problem in men, but it often affects women. Many wives have told me that their husband’s irritability, anger, and withdrawal undermine their marriage and cause problems within the family. They seek help for the man, but also for themselves.

Dr. Fred: In our culture, men tend to have a “lone ranger” mentality. They are not overly communicative and often in denial about issues like depression and IMS. What can their female partners do to help their male partners come to terms with these issues?

Men are often afraid to ask for help. They see that he has little virility. This even includes going infor their annual medical exam. As one male customer said. “I’m going to do my annual checkup maybe once every 10 years.” Women are often the ones who gently but firmly tell the man he needs to get checked out. I have a whole program that I developed for women on how to help themselves while they help the man in their life.

Dr. Fred: What do you think would contribute most to seniors experiencing genuine happiness?

We have to accept who we are and that includes the different changes that men and women go through as we age. Becoming an older man poses different challenges than becoming an older woman. We can learn a lot from each other. But to do this, we must be willing to let go of the “good” and the “bad” and look for ways to communicate and heal.

Dr. Fred: What new projects are you working on?

I have a new book: “Mr. Mean: Save Yourself and Your Relationship From Irritable Man Syndrome” and I’m working on a new book due out by the end of the year that is called “Tapping Power”.

People can get my free e-book: Andropause (male menopause) What is this crazy thing we go through? by visiting my website http://SurvivingMaleMenopause.com

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